now ..I  have to move from these pessimistic n vaahiyaat views ...have to look life really very differently otherwise situation won't uplift ..it will become more severe ...

Now at this point of time to re-start my thinking process , means want to move to optimistic person as iwas till few months back ..always hoping and thinking only "  brighter side" ..always saying dharmendra's apne dialogue " hit it hard before it hits you bad ..maro salli iss zindagi ""...really to re-invent myself as I have no choice , I have to think about my school  and college days ...n most importantly my Hostel days ...I can't control my smile n inner voice which is repeatedly now yelling ...yes those were the best days of my life ...during those days I wasn't focussed but always wanted to fulfil my father's dream ...from childhood I used to listen from my father's friends , uncles and other family members how good he was in studies , field work , sports , his fast bowling , volleyball smashes n sixes , how great fighter he was ....as a kid n till today I always wanted to be like him .

to keep his eyes n nose in straight position I scored well in 10 n 12 ..always involved in sports and did really well ...now today I am promising myself to start working hard for those masculine eyes and  love ,,,which always feel me like a cub because he is and will always be LION to me ...